What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Make Nazis afraid again!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

What are the top 5 star Michelin restaurants near Pompano Beach, Florida?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Why is there so much hate against black people?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Why can’t conservatives accept the fact that they are stupid?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

How come I can't stay sober?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

What caused the Democratic Party's 2024 presidential campaign to implode so horrifically?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

What do most wives fantasize about?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

TEXT:

What is the Abu Shusha massacre in Palestine?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

How does the narcissist react when he realizes you no longer care?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

How do you fight the push and pull (manipulation) tactic if you want to win him?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

I feel so attached and in love with a dead celebrity. My love for anyone else is overshadowed by my love for him. What does this mean?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

How do I become a Buddhist, and can someone explain Buddhism to me?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …